i think i have hit and surpasss my limit.. to burst out crying more than 3 times in the span of 2 days is totally a new record for me.

is this healthy? i ask myself.. is this wat i want? is this wat i'm willing to put myself through? is this how life is supposed to be? is this how we build ourselves to be better people? is it masochistic? when do i know enuf is enuf? or is there an enuf? or life is just about constantly stretching yourself? where will we end up? how far to stretch? wat is the reward? wat am i living for? am i happy?

many many many questions popped into my head these days.. on some days.. i just want to throw everything away and heck it.. other days.. i wish i had a brick in my hand so that i can smash people's head with it.. and there are also some days whereby i find the strength to carry on what i'm doing..

so wat does it mean then? where do i go now?