camp.. psych camp..


i could still remember the time when i was in year one..

i was alone.. one person in a faculty that i don't know.. a place where i know no one.. mismatch.. a science student in an arts faculty..

not that i minded going to an unfamiliar place.. not that i needed friends to be around me all the time.. i managed fine on my own.. figured out bidding, my way around sch, the right place to go tutorials, using ivle.. it wasn't tough..

but.. going lectures and tutorials on my own... then go home when it finishes.. it all just feels too cold to me..

sch to me.. used to be a place full of fun and laughter.. if i don't know anyone, i make friends out of the ppl around me.. but.. in arts.. life alone was tough.. u see ppl hanging around their friends... u see ppl having lunch partners.. and i always felt left out.. like why didn't i know ppl earlier.. ppl i do projects with just want to finish the work.. always rushing off to other meetings or to classes.. no one seems to have time to stop and chat.. making friends was tough.. everyone seemed unfriendly and unapproachable..

i'll always be thankful to justina for asking me to go for a camp of a society that she was in..

i didn't want to go at first.. cos.. i was tired.. too comfortable in my own shell to want to go for camps.. but.. i told myself that i had to make some friends and the camp was about self awareness.. something that i am always interested in knowing..

frankly speaking, there was not much self awareness in it.. but the bonding.. amazing is one word that i will describe it.. the feeling that it is safe and ok to share your thots with ppl u don't know.. to talk about issues that u never broach to even good friends that u had for years.. i came out rich... with friends to say hi to when i go to sch.. with ppl to take classes with.. with ppl who stop by for a chat, a word of encouragement, a moment of relaxation..

i felt like i found my place in this seemingly cold university.. a place that i can belong..

camp was something that i felt i could give back wat i have gotten from this society.. a place i push myself out of my comfort zone to give.. to learn.. to provide.. to experience..

i was worried at first.. not knowing wat to do.. cos i don't know how to facilitate.. i have never been to any orientation in university.. not even o week.. so.. i compromised and told them that i wanted to be a ranger.. to act freshie for the first day gives me enuf time to be comfortable enuf to interact with them..

the three days were like a whirlwind.. i didn't know if wat i did was right or not.. all i remembered was planning before camp wat we the facils hope to do for our grp.. wat kind of souvenir we can give them to take back.. pre camp was tiring.. but we still stayed up whole night to think of how to bond the grp.. thinking of cheers and games.. and soon, it was over.. ribbon ceremony was unforgettable.. you see a bunch of tired faces.. but.. they say the sweetest things.. touched was wat i felt.. i didn't know wat i did.. but.. hearing how they felt about the camp.. made me feel like i did alot.. like i have a part to play in giving them the experience they had..

some of the campers told me.. that they never knew that they can make friends like this.. that it was a very memorable experience.. some say they were very glad to have made the decision to come, otherwise they would have missed out on this wonderful experience.. they no longer feel lost in this big sch.. that they have found a place they can go to.. that will always be there for them.. some thank the organisers.. the most touching thing of all.. is to hear ppl saying that they too want to come back to help in the camp any way they can, to be like the facils.. to give ppl the experience that they have gotten..

giving back is only something that ppl do when they have received...

and giving back.. wanting to see the same experience being given to everyone else.. the care and warmth that was felt.. the sense of belonging.. was wat that has kept me going.. i know wat i do may not be enuf.. but.. every small action counts.. and ppl will see it.. no matter how minute it is.. it is the heart that counts... a simple action can change ppl's lifes.. and i want to change it for the better..

a simple camp.. may not be that simple after all..

with that same purpose i joined psych camp.. the comm..

i admit.. i do get lost and frustrated now and then.. but.. i have never forgotten that goal.. it is always at the back of my head.. that wat i do can give ppl the chance to make their lifes alittle better.. and.. the knowledge there are alot of ppl out there.. who believes in us.. who also wants to give back .. who are always there to support to get help from.. it shows that.. they too, have been touched.. it's not the superficial thing that matters.. but the heart.. and.. ppl do feel it..

so.. for the ppl.. strive on..

personal touch always wins over the flowery stuff.. looking good and nice is not enuf..