i keep see ppl cough around me... feel like wearing a mask.... hahahha

watching shows sometimes trigger things that i want to forget... other times... allows me to think about some things and re-evaluate them.. from a different view... a different perspective... makes me understand what had happened better but yet nothing really changed outwardly... i'm still wondering if this kind of process is needed or i'm just wasting my time thinking abt things that can't be changed.. but i guess it brings me some kind of greater understanding of wat had transpired... allowing me to feel.... better?... i think... probably bring me closer to closure instead of keeping them in the dark little corners of my compartments........

spring cleaning... i guess....

Leave Out All The Rest - Linkin Park

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if you're asking me
I want you to know

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
[End Chorus]

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

[Chorus]
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well

Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

i want a car.... more specifically... a suzuki swift auto car..... hahaha...

i doubt i would get it even if i add all my future bdaes together for it.... hahaha...

wants and needs.... i guess i can always do without a want....

my damn cute niece....

she singing shania twain's 'from this moment'..... i still have no idea how she can rem all those lyrics...

i'm tired..... i need rest....

there are things and ppl that are too energy draining for me....

i am so looking forward to nov/dec..... but definitely not pleased abt the hole it might cause in my pocket... but ah well... one must pay the price for some fun....

The Answer is...........................

the above is the caption for stefanie's concert... and the youtube is some snippets of the fantabulous concert....

i have to say.... her stage makes me drool..... and on many occasions.... i momentarily forgot that i was there to watch her perform and not stare in amazement at wat the stage can do and wonder watelse the stage can do.... mr gadget would love that stage...

at first when i reached there... i was wondering why there is a snail shell kind of design on the stage... i thot i kenna cheated... cos they say it's a DIAMOND stage.... and ppl should die if they cheat the ladies off their diamonds... but ugh feeling was gone once they started the concert.... the concentric circle like thing could actually open backwards and reveal her... damn cool.. so futuristic.....

and then the next wow come soon after that as the images start to flood the snail shell/diamond thingy... it turned into a high class projector screen that is damn big and has so many angles in the design that made things come alive/3d when shown on it... cool sia... one finally understood where the diamond came abt when the 3d visuals were played on it... chio.....

one of course thot there must be one more surprise with that stage... of course... we were not disappointed... she came out from behind the stage floating on a mini hot air ballon stage.... damn cool.... it also held her electric piano so she was in mid air playing tunes while she sign... very very pretty design... i think u all can see it in the youtube video...

when one thot that the stage is more than zai-ness can express... in comes 3d lazers that created such a real live version of her singing that me and my ma argued a good 2mins abt whether it's animation or she was just there, just that the light is shining differently... very very chio lar... only when that image suddenly disappear and the real stefanie appear then my ma conceded that it was 3d lazer stuff... hahahah...

also.. there are many parts of the stage that allowed her to make her entrances and exits... more than 4 i think... and the elevation thingy also alot.... but one did not expect the long ramp that is joined to the snail diamond shell to detach itself and make a 100 over degree sweep from left of the stage to the right side....

with all these gadgets already there... it was still a shock to see that her band was hidden behind 4 tiny globes near the main diamond shell... and it wasn't enuf.... the globes were hung in mid air and flip 180 degrees to reveal a back that had many light bulbs on it and they turned into part of the lighting for the show.... multi funtional sia... OMG.... i really kao tao to them.... make me drool whole night abt the wonderful stage.... a magnificant piece of art...

hmm... right... as u can see.... urs truly was totally mesmerised by the stage.... hahhaha.. ok lar... her singing improved tremendously... no out of tune liao... but sometimes either cannot hear or breatheless... her starting voice a bit metallic... don't sit well with me... but i guess she did that cos it was a futuristic concept.. song choice wise.... i quite like cos it's the songs she usually don't sing during concerts... and this time round the changing of the tunes of the songs was much better than the last time... at least this time they are still recognisable and singable... and the tune quite match the song actually.... so... nice....

i was quite impressed by the dancers when i could tear myself away from the diamond shell stage + animations.... i thot i was watching some modern dance performance or some theatrical performance.... very expressive... very coordinated... i like... and they so poor thing.... must be poppish.... modern and expressive... acrobatic..... and sometimes even pull a few cheerleading poses...... really quite pro....

i have to talk abt the costumes! the dancers ones were quite nice leh... there's one where they had to veil their whole face like fencing.... i wonder how they know where to go.... and stefanie's costumes were OMGish.... mostly dresses... short short ones... mainly cute ones.... some glam ones... never seen her in those things before lor.... an eye opener... i guess the way u dress changes the way you present yourself.... she was so cutesy... and hmm... should i use sexy? i guess her hot scale shot up quite a bit for most ppl.... no more tomboyish looks... almost like the cute girl next door with her flowy dress and her long pony tail.... i guess it's her way to show the world that she is quite girl one... and the dressing in dresses and skirts and long hair to her represents a certain kind of freedom... the kind she didn't have under the music companies.. i think no one's gonna complain abt her new wardrobe~~....

i guess that's all folks... it's been a long day for me and there is still work tmr... gah.... nites.....

OH YAR... we encored twice.... so cool... tata~~

why do i always end up doing things that i want to slap myself for? sigh...

it feels... strangely... unsatisfying...

hmmmmm... don't know...

__________

seems like i have less and less 2nd chances to dish out nowadays... not sure if i've lost my patience with ppl or too quick to make judgements and sticking to them... hmm...

__________

it's a bitch when ppl u have complained abt mins ago comes offer you help.. sometimes i feel a stab of guilt for passing such a quick judgement before the person can prove himself... other times... i feel that i have made the judgement based on observations of their behavior and them being nice to me is aside from it... sigh... this confuses me...

_______

i'm not sure if i'm getting wat i want from this but i'm enjoying myself quite a bit... and... money is currently not a need, so it hasn't really fall into my consideration... BUT then again.... one should plan further ahead... and money definitely will be a need in the future... the question is... can i afford to take a gamble that i can manoever such that i enjoy wat i'm enjoying now and still get the money i need when i need it in the future...

it will certainly take some skill and luck...

________

i've been getting quite a bit of these weird vivid dreams that seems to make sense but doesn't at the same time... i wonder wat they mean....

________

and abt the h1n1 business.... i'm not afraid to get it... i just don't want my mum to get it... so that means i need to be careful that i don't get it... gah....

for my mummy... i will be guai guai and don't anyhow run.... hmmm.... can't avoid work though... zzzz....

_____


one more thing... they are having a sequel for alvin and the chipmuncks!!!! sharon... u come back we watch... it shows in dec.... and it's called.... Alvin and the Chipmuncks 2: The Squeakuel... hahha.. so cute right... squeakuel...